I am on the brink of going back to old methods of dealing with things and it is scaring me. Why can't I just love myself? I don't get it.

I'm not overweight right now, but I definitely feel like it....

*sigh* I don't know what to think. This whole thing is just so silly. I've wasted a good chunk of my life worrying about these unimportant things. Yet, no matter how many times I try and convince myself that they are unimportant, I doubt myself and my judgement. Maybe being thin is important. Maybe that is what God had in mind for us. For us all to be walking skeletons.

I hope this feeling goes away soon because I was, for the first time in a few years, doing well in school. I have discovered that I am actually somewhat intelligent. Not really smart, but not dumb either. I am starting to fall behind again, though.

I thought the extra 10 mg of Prozac that I was bumped up was supposed to make me feel better, not worse. Maybe I just need to adjust to it or something. Will try and wait this out and see what happens.